Funny sarcastic sayings

You might also like our lists of Funny Spring Quotes, Funny Summer Quotes and Funny Fall Quotes. “There are only two seasons – winter and Baseball.”. – Bill Veeck. “Winter is on my head, but eternal spring is in my heart.”. – Victor Hugo. “The very fact of snow is such an amazement.”.Passenger Princess Sweater, Smiley Face,Sarcastic Sweatshirt,Funny Sayings,Mommy Sweatshirt,Girlfriend Sweater,Sassy Sayings,Wife Sweatshirt (1.4k) Sale Price $22.25 $ 22.25 $ 44.50 Original Price $44.50 (50% off) Sale ends in 15 hours Add to Favorites Expensive And Difficult Sweatshirt, Funny Mom Sweatshirt, Mom Life Sweatshirt, …1. “I always say ‘Morning’ instead of ‘Good Morning,’ because if it was a good morning, I would still be in my bed and not talking to people.”. 2. “Some days you eat salads and go to the gym. Some days you eat cupcakes and refuse to put on pants. It’s called balance.”. 3. “Face your problems, don’t Facebook them.”. 4.Oct 27, 2023 · 5. The tide wouldn’t take that fella out. One of many funny short Irish sayings that makes a jab at someones appearance is this one! For example: “The state of your man – the tide wouldn’t even take him out!”. 6. You’ve a head on you that would make an onion cry. Sarcastic Quotes About Fake People. “Oh, please, keep telling me about your endless authenticity while you change your personality like outfits.”. “Fake people should come …Dec 14, 2023 · No, love is hiding who you really are at all times, even when you're sleeping. Love is wearing makeup to bed and going downstairs to the Burger King to poop, and hiding alcohol in perfume bottles ... Sarcastic Svg Bundle, Sarcastic Svg Files, Sarcasm Svg, Funny Quotes Svg Bundle, Sarcastic Sayings Svg Bundle, Sarcastic Quotes Svg Cricut (439) Sale Price $2.10 $ 2.10 $ 4.20 Original Price $4.20 (50% off) Digital Download Add to Favorites ...Jun 18, 2020 · 63. “Sleeping is my drug, my bed is my dealer and my alarm clock is the police.”. 64. “It’s okay if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste.”. 65. “Sarcasm – the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it.”. 66. “You look good when your eyes are closed, but you look the best when my eyes closed.”. Funny and sarcastic quotes Photo: unsplash.com (modified by author) Source: UGC. A funny, sarcastic quote can easily lighten up the mood, no matter how embarrassing or bad a situation is. Blending humour with clever, sarcastic quotes about life is a great way of forming stronger bonds with your opponent as they get to laugh while …Funny Money Quotes. 1. “Money is like a sixth sense – and you can’t make use of the other five without it.”. – William Somerset Maugham. 2. “Money, if it does not bring you happiness, will at least help you be miserable in comfort.”. – Helen Gurley Brown. 3.Sarcastic Quotes. Sarcastic Quotes. 57,820 likes · 36 talking about this. Sarcasm Forever!!! Welcome to the page full of sarcastic, funny and witty posts.Your words and actions can help someone with depression. They could also hurt them. Here’s what not to say or do when you want to help. If your loved one is living with depression,...Nov 30, 2023 · Funny well-being quotes. “My ability to turn good news into anxiety is rivaled only by my ability to turn anxiety into chin acne.”. ― Tina Fey, “Bossypants”. “Reality continues to ruin ... Jul 8, 2021 · 4. "I been running all over hell's half acre." Getty Images. 5. "She has her nose so high in the air she could drown in a rainstorm." Getty Images. 6. "He’s so cheap he wouldn’t give a nickel to see Jesus ridin’ a bicycle." Advertisement - Continue Reading Below. Apr 7, 2023 · Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.”. “A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun.”. “Another year older, another year wiser, and still as funny as ever.”. “Birthdays are like cheese; they just get better with age.”. “Age is just a number, but a birthday is a reason ... It’s easier to express our feelings to other people by being sarcastic. Love is a blind whore with mental disease and no sense of humor. 1. “I don’t mean to interrupt people I just randomly remember things & get really excited”. 2. “Sarcasm the witty will have fun, but the stupid won’t get it.”. 3.Best Sarcastic Quotes And Funny Sarcasm Sayings. 11. “Twinkle twinkle little snitch, mind your business nosey bitch.”. sarcastic quotes on beauty quotes about sarcasm and intelligence. 12. “My body is a temple ancient and crumbling probably cursed or haunted”. 13. “Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow ...Nov 6, 2021 · Jesus Christ the same yesterday, today and forever." 10. "Me thinking about my life." 11. "When you're an adult but you feel like a kid faking their way through life." 12. "When everything is ... Famous sarcastic sayings for hilarious remarks. They say if you can cleverly blend sarcasm with some humour, then you are intelligent. Using funny, sarcastic sayings is a perfect way of stating your thoughts funnily and less harshly. Here are sarcastic one-liners to get you started: People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day ...Funny coffee quotes that speak to your soul. 1. “Coffee is a language itself.”. — Jackie Chan. 2. “I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.”. — Lewis Black ...So we gathered up our favorite funny (and SUPER sarcastic) quotes because honestly, we just don't give a damn anymore. AMZ ... You are a kind, beautiful, and amazing person. I hope you accept my birthday wishes and these lies on your birthday today! I won't lie—I'm only here for the cake. Happy birthday! Another year has gone by, but you haven't gotten any wiser. Oh, well. Happy birthday! I don't feel like wishing you a happy birthday.Mar 26, 2021 · Sarcastic Kitchen Quotes. No Bitchin’ In My Kitchen. Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, so they say. But when it comes to kitchen quotes, some of those sarcastic sayings are also the funniest. Annoying the cook will result in STARVATION. Calories don’t count on the weekend. Cheese – Milk’s leap towards imortality. Nov 8, 2023 - Explore All Things Funny's board "Funny Quotes and Sayings", followed by 7,664 people on Pinterest. See more ideas about funny quotes, quotes, funny. Jan 31, 2022 · 21 Share ADVERTISEMENT Yeah, surely the quotes you’ll find below aren’t sarcastic. Not the slightest bit. They’re just as light and cheery as daffodil fluff floating in the azure summer sky, with no dual meanings, no sly remarks, and no storm clouds here. Nuh-uh, no way. They aren’t even that funny; who cares for sarcastic quotes, anyway? Funny Quotes From Famous '90s TV Shows. Check out this list of funny sitcom quotes and sitcom one-liners from our all-time favorite TV shows. 1. "Ethel and I have decided that you have married us and not a television set." - Lucy Ricardo, 'I Love Lucy'. 2.This Sarcastic SVG Bundle contains 15 designs that can be used for different purposes. The Quotes of the designs are: In the bundle, you will get interesting designs with delightful quotes and elements. These designs are amazing on: – Shirts. – Mugs. – Signs. – Cards. – Home decoration.Chelsea Handler. 6. “If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.”—. George Bernard Shaw. 7. “Nothing like watching your relatives fight, I always say ...Best Sarcastic Quotes on Stupidity. 1. Stupidity is like a giant car heading towards a brick wall, and everyone’s arguing over where they’re going to sit.”. 2. It’s better to be the greatest of all stupids than to …Jul 22, 2022 · Funny Bad Day Quotes to Make You Laugh Out Loud. 1.) “I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.”. – Stephen Bishop. 2.) “Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.”. – Sophie Kinsella. Good Sarcastic Quotes. 7. It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue. 8. There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage. 9. Don’t be humble… you’re not that great. 10.Funny Farewell Messages. We will miss seeing you in the office. (Not really). Have a great life. It will not be the same without you. It will actually be better! Farewell! It’s a good thing you are leaving; one less person to suffer in the office. Just kidding.This Sarcastic SVG Bundle contains 15 designs that can be used for different purposes. The Quotes of the designs are: In the bundle, you will get interesting designs with delightful quotes and elements. These designs are amazing on: – Shirts. – Mugs. – Signs. – Cards. – Home decoration.5 Sept 2023 ... Comments1 · Sarcastic Quotes And Funny Sarcasm Sayings || Insults, Comebacks, Funny and Witty Quotes · I spent 748 Days to Find the 300 Best ...Lusting, Loving, & Leaving Sex Musings Relationship Research in the Media Relationships & Pop Culture Research Spotlight Infographics Q&A’s Ever wish to be honest without hurting somebody’s …1. “I always say ‘Morning’ instead of ‘Good Morning,’ because if it was a good morning, I would still be in my bed and not talking to people.”. 2. “Some days you eat salads and go to the gym. Some days you eat cupcakes and refuse to put on pants. It’s called balance.”. 3. “Face your problems, don’t Facebook them.”. 4. Also, check out: 50 Epic And Funny Sarcastic Quotes To Get You Through A Bad Day. Sarcastic Savage Quotes For Instagram Captions “If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.” — Katharine Hepburn “I’m gracing you with my presence.” — Kourtney Kardashian “I drop a picture, now these b*tches feel attacked.” — Megan Thee ...27 Jul 2021 ... Hilarious quotes and stupid funny sayings and 'double entendre' quotes animation! You'll laugh your head off...100+ Funny Svg Bundle, Sarcastic Quotes Bundle Designs Popular Svg, Sarcastic Svg, Sarcastic Png -Printable, Cricut & Silhouette 4.9 (25.5k) ... Plato. “He was a wise man who invented beer.”. — Plato. The compliment of “wise” really means a lot coming from Plato. We’d like to think he’d also enjoy these funny drinking quotes ...This Sarcastic SVG Bundle contains 15 designs that can be used for different purposes. The Quotes of the designs are: In the bundle, you will get interesting designs with delightful quotes and elements. These designs are amazing on: – Shirts. – Mugs. – Signs. – Cards. – Home decoration.Sarcastic Quotes are often funny, ironic, sardonic, and satiric. If you are feeling witty and want to communicate your message through sarcastic remarks, here …Sarcastic Quotes That You Can Use as Captions. A psychologist can’t fix stupidity. Apparently, it’s not a disorder that is recognized. Always remember that you’re unique. Same as everyone else. Avoid arguing with fools. At a distance, spectators can’t tell which one is which. Be very careful of humans.You are a kind, beautiful, and amazing person. I hope you accept my birthday wishes and these lies on your birthday today! I won't lie—I'm only here for the cake. Happy birthday! Another year has gone by, but you haven't gotten any wiser. Oh, well. Happy birthday! I don't feel like wishing you a happy birthday.I deserve sugar, spice, and all things nice. I can have peace, even when people irritate me. I can have peace, even when people irritate me.”. I am a superhero, and my power is peace. Only positivity goes with my outfit. Self-deprecation is so last season. Releasing stress is a piece of cake.Nov 6, 2021 · Jesus Christ the same yesterday, today and forever." 10. "Me thinking about my life." 11. "When you're an adult but you feel like a kid faking their way through life." 12. "When everything is ... Nov 15, 2021 · 1. “First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.” —F. Scott Fitzgerald. 2. “I’m still the same person I was last year—now I’m just hungover ... Funny Condolences for an Illness. The best way to get through a challenging illness is with great medicine and support from your friends and loved ones. After that, a little bit of humor goes a long way. 1. I feel your pain, and I’m sick of it, so please get well soon. Though it’s a clichéd message of compassion embedded in the American ...Here are 38 funny sarcasm quotes and sayings to make you laugh. Best Sarcastic Quotes And Funny Sarcasm Sayings Not everyone gets the same version of …4. Get someone’s goat. via GIPHY. When you get (or steal) a goat owned by somebody else, of course that person would get mad. But the origin of this idiom is far more interesting than that. This expression actually comes from horse-racing where goats are used to have a calming effect on thoroughbred horses.Sarcastic Quotes That You Can Use as Captions. A psychologist can’t fix stupidity. Apparently, it’s not a disorder that is recognized. Always remember that you’re unique. Same as everyone else. Avoid arguing with fools. At a distance, spectators can’t tell which one is which. Be very careful of humans.Sending funny eCards is a great way to brighten someone’s day and share a good laugh. Whether it’s for a birthday, holiday, or just because, funny eCards can instantly put a smile ...Sarcastic Quotes. Sarcastic Quotes. 57,820 likes · 36 talking about this. Sarcasm Forever!!! Welcome to the page full of sarcastic, funny and witty posts.1. “Life’s too short to do things you hate just to win the approval of others.” 2. “The monsters in my head always knew that I would lose you in the end.” 3. “You look like something I …12) モヤモヤする – Feeling confused. Pronunciation: Moya moya suru. “Moya moya” is a funny phrase that describes when your mind is cloudy. It can be used when you’re indecisive or can’t commit to something. Charm your Japanese friends by saying this phrase next time you’re unsure or confused.Tackling it with a bit of sarcasm and humor can make it a bit easier. Check out these funny, sarcastic quotes about life to take on a more light-hearted approach to the way you live …Are you tired of sending the same old traditional birthday cards year after year? Do you want to add some laughter and excitement to your loved one’s special day? Look no further t...We expect signs to give us important information, like warnings about what to anticipate when we’re driving or location signs to tell us where we are. However, some people have com...Funny Sarcastic Quotes with Images. Sarcasm is a wry form of humor. If you are a sarcasm lover and enjoy this particularly biting form of humor, then these sarcastic …Your words and actions can help someone with depression. They could also hurt them. Here’s what not to say or do when you want to help. If your loved one is living with depression,...Read the first word again.”. “If you text ‘I love you’ to a person and the person writes back an emoji — no matter what that emoji is, they don’t love you back.”. — Chelsea Peretti. “I lost my teddy, will you sleep with me for teddy.”. “I am yours. No refunds.”.Funny well-being quotes. “My ability to turn good news into anxiety is rivaled only by my ability to turn anxiety into chin acne.”. ― Tina Fey, “Bossypants”. “Reality continues to ruin ...Another example of a funny disclaimer is a giant sign with a picture of a hot dog in an aisle at Ikea, with a warning in the corner that this is not the actual size. It is funny, b...The following 22 sarcastic Zen phrases illustrate that perfectly. They’re lighthearted, yet inspiring and zen. Check them out. 1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone. 2. This collection of sarcastic, funny quotes will come in handy for when you're SO finished dealing with people's crap today. ... From the sweetest love quotes, inspirational sayings, and ...A Disney Facebook group helps a woman find her missing boyfriend at Epcot, but there are lessons to learn from this hilarious tale to keep your family safe while visiting a busy th...Friday is sponsored by the anticipation of the weekend. Music always sounds better on Friday. – Lou Brutus. Life is like Friday on a soap opera. It gives you the illusion that everything is going to wrap up, and then the same old shit starts up on Monday. – Stephen King. Read also: 42 Monday quotes to kick off the week like a badass.Funny Money Quotes. 1. “Money is like a sixth sense – and you can’t make use of the other five without it.”. – William Somerset Maugham. 2. “Money, if it does not bring you happiness, will at least help you be miserable in comfort.”. – Helen Gurley Brown. 3.Have you ever come across these pictures with retro ladies smiling combined with sarcastic tongue-in-cheek captions? If you have, and also found them funny, then this article is your cup of tea. An artist called Anne Taintor is the originator of these snarky vintage illustrations that will surely make you laugh if you have a slightly …Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. -Mark Twain. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. – George Carlin. Wise men speak because they have something to say; fools because they have to say something. -Plato.Check out our list of our Funny Sayings for more. 128. “Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”. 129. “Today is Monday, and that reasons enough for me to hate it.”. 130. “People who say “good morning” should be forced to prove it.Have a fantastic birthday!”. “May your day be as bright as your smile and as sweet as the cake. Happy birthday!”. “Cheers to another year of adventures, laughter, and all the good things life has to offer. Happy birthday!”. “Age is just a number, and you’re handling it with style. Have a fun-filled birthday!”.61 Funny Sister Quotes Worth Sharing. 1. “Sometimes I think I am ugly, but then I look at my sister and get over it.”. 2. “More than Santa Claus, your sister knows when you’ve been bad and good.” —Linda Sunshine. 3. “As I grew up, one of my strongest allies was my sister.” —Patti Smith. 4. My mom did not raise a dummy.Jul 26, 2023 · Funny Sarcastic Quotes with Images. Sarcasm is a wry form of humor. If you are a sarcasm lover and enjoy this particularly biting form of humor, then these sarcastic sayings are a must-read! We give you the ultimate list of sarcastic quotes, quoted by some famous people, and some anonymous authors. Yeah, naw, surely the Check out our list of our Funny Sayings for more. 128. “Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”. 129. “Today is Monday, and that reasons enough for me to hate it.”. 130. “People who say “good morning” should be forced to prove it.Whether it’s a playful joke or a witty line, these t-shirts make your day more enjoyable and get people talking. Here are some examples of funny t-shirt sayings: “I’m not arguing; I’m just explaining why I’m right.”. “Sarcasm: just one of my many talents.”. “I speak fluent movie quotes and sarcasm.”.Funny Farewell Messages. We will miss seeing you in the office. (Not really). Have a great life. It will not be the same without you. It will actually be better! Farewell! It’s a good thing you are leaving; one less person to suffer in the office. Just kidding.Mar 18, 2022 · Sarcastic Quotes On Life Facts. “If you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made. Very few people die past that age.”. George Burns. “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”. Steve Martin. “All generalizations are false, including this one.”. Mark Twain. “The way my luck is running, if I was a politician, I would be ... Funny Christmas Quotes. Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard. Andy Borowitz. Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. Victor Borge. My husband’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is to become Scrooge. Melanie White. “There are 17 more shopping days until Christmas.Release Date: 10th December '21. Updated Date: 23rd February '22. Product Tags: Funny Quotes For Mugs Sassy Svg Bundle Sarcastic Bundle Sarcastic Svg Bundle Sarcastic Quotes Sassy Quotes Sassy Women Svg Funny Sayings For Bags Funny Quote Bundle Sarcastic Shirt Design. File Types Included: EPS DXF PNG SVG. Projects:Here are some funny cat quotes that prove it. “In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.”. – Terry Pratchett, Writer. “Cats do not have to be shown how to have a good time, for they are unfailingly ingenious in that respect.”. – James Mason, Actor.In today’s digital age, funny videos have become a popular form of entertainment for people of all ages. Whether you’re looking to brighten your day or simply unwind after a long d...75+ Funny Sarcastic Quotes. Husband: Tell me an interesting fact that will make me happy and sad at the same time. Wife: Yours is bigger than all your friends. Sarcasm: The ability to insult idiots …17. 傻蛋 (shǎ dàn) A very common and lowkey hilarious insult in Mandarin is 傻蛋 or “stupid egg.”. Depending on the situation, this can either be a playful insult when a friend does something dumb or straight up fightin’ words if said to a stranger. 18. 滚蛋! (gǔn dàn!) 蛋 (dàn) or “egg” is a versatile term in Chinese!Best and Funny Sarcastic Quotes | Sarcasm Sayings. 61. “If your phone doesn’t ring, it’s me.”. 62. “A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock”. 63. “My level of sarcasm has gotten to the point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.”. 64. “I’m smiling…. Are you in need of a good laugh? Look no further than the world of funny video compilations. With countless options available online, finding the best “try not to laugh” videos has...We expect signs to give us important information, like warnings about what to anticipate when we’re driving or location signs to tell us where we are. However, some people have com...Ciao. ‘Ciao’ is a french term for greeting someone at the time of their arrival or departure. Using unique words and slang to greet someone always acquires the capability of being extremely funny and humouristic. Ciao is more of a single laugh receiver than a long laugh or a major humoristic moment.13. Short Retirement Quotes. Here are quotes that are short and sweet—ideal for texting and eliciting a chuckle or two from your retired friend or family member. “Retirement: Enjoy every day.”. “Retirement is not the end, it’s a new beginning.”. “The best is yet to come.”. “Life begins at retirement.”.Savage Sarcastic Quotes. 1. “I’d explain it to you, but I don’t have crayons and a blank piece of paper with me right now.”. 2 “You consistently set low expectations for yourself and still fail to meet them.”. 3. “I’ve met some pricks in my time, but you, sir, are a cactus.”. 4. | omgqkjgxdm (article) | rrwrhy.